Dealing with character flaws

Matthew 7:1-11

1 Don’t judge, so that you won’t be judged. 2 For the way you judge others is how you will be judged — the measure with which you measure out will be used to measure to you. 3 Why do you see the splinter in your brother’s eye but not notice the log in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the splinter out of your eye,’ when you have the log in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite! First, take the log out of your own eye; then you will see clearly, so that you can remove the splinter from your brother’s eye!

6 “Don’t give to dogs what is holy, and don’t throw your pearls to the pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, then turn and attack you.

7 “Keep asking, and it will be given to you; keep seeking, and you will find; keep knocking, and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who keeps asking receives; he who keeps seeking finds; and to him who keeps knocking, the door will be opened. 9 Is there anyone here who, if his son asks him for a loaf of bread, will give him a stone? 10 or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 So if you, even though you are bad, know how to give your children gifts that are good, how much more will your Father in heaven keep giving good things to those who keep asking him!

How sweet it is to trust in Jesus, i am so grateful for the Holy spirit. When Jesus was about to die He instructed the disciples to wait on the Holy spirit and he would be their comforter.

I am grateful for this gift, since last week i have been learning about character flaws. so many people have issues with character that is somewhat inbuilt because of their personality, their upbringing or their diverse life experiences. This is true for married, dating or courting individuals. I am a victim of this character flaws myself and some can be self-inflicting or damage our partners.

The spirit of God dropped this in my spirit several times this week when i felt justified to throw tantrums at my beloved; No greater love than this that a man should lay down his life for another, i often used this verse to demand certain things or attitudes from my bae, but God ministered to me that it also applies to me. No greater love than this, thai i should lay down my life for him. I started seeing my character flaws and the revelation that God loved me with all those. Romans 5:8 God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. God requires us to love even when in unpleasant situations. God's reason for love was that his eyes saw what we could become once we accepted His love into our lives and once it transformed us and for that he died. We also ought to adopt that. Love holds power to transform. Once we see through love what we can be and what our mates can be we are to pray for God to continue giving us love for one another and praying for transformation for each other. The God who called and placed you together has the ability to work all things out for good. That is why it is important to have God from the foundation and build with Him. He holds the master plan and can always be a point of reference.

So, how do we deal with character flaws? The Holy spirit reminded me of 4 basics that i would love to share with you from Matthew 7;

1 Do not Judge

Remember you also have flaws, do not be too hard on your partner when they forget something you have mentioned to them to either do or stop doing, give them love. Exercise patience. Do not take it as a defiance of your instructions or a lack of care for your feelings or emotions. Do not act out but be silent about it as you also look at your own flaws and understand that you are two different people working to be one.

2 Work on your own flaws

Instead of focusing on your partners flaws realize that you also have areas of shortcoming. Let your partners flaws prompt you to pray for your own flaws, and ask that God work on you and them.

3 Protect each other

Treat your relationship as sacred, special and valuable. Do not expose the things you are struggling about your partner with every other person. Firstly share it with God, if you have parents, pastors, best couple or friends that are prayerful and of sound judgement share with them for prayer and Godly counsel. Remember always share with the intention of helping and not making the other party look bad. Guard the relationship and each other. Be careful about your attitude when such flaws pop up

4 Keep Praying for change

The last part of the scripture says those who ask will receive, who seek will find and who knock will find the door opened. It also assures us that we being bad know how to give good gifts, how much more God to us? Do not get tired of asking for God to deal with the character flaws of your partner. This will be genuine ones and keep believing that He is able to do so. Do not get tired of praying for them, He is faithful and will do it.

I am also learning to do the same and for the time i have been doing this i have felt so liberated in my spirit. Do not be bound with chains and fetters in self-created prisons.

I leave us with this quote from Anni Franco

I know there is strength in the differences between us. I know there is comfort where we overlap.

May we find the strength

May we find the comfort